When you’re broken hearted or going through a rough break up, it can be easier to suppress the feelings, avoid the pain and ignore your heart’s sadness.
Your mind and body are overwhelmed with pain and you react rather than act. You might delete your ex off Facebook, block them on Instagram, and throw out all the memorabilia because it feels so uncomfortable and heart breaking to see them!
Realistically, the only thing that heals a broken heart is time; however, the difference between dwelling on it for a few weeks vs a few months or years is the following method of meditation (below), which I practiced intuitively after ending a toxic relationship in 2012. After 6 months of not being able to get him out of my head and wallowing in the pain of the abusive relationship, I finally decided to DO something – and this visual meditation helped move him out of my head, heart and energy field.
So if struggling to let go of your ex partner, try this mediation to help release them. I can’t promise it will take away the pain, however it will lessen the inner disturbances and bring you back to a place of peace.
LETTING GO MEDITATON
Find a quiet place, sit cross legged or however you feel comfortable in a seated position, close your eyes, take five deep long breaths to help clear your head.
If you find it hard to clear your thoughts, just focus on your breath going in and out, inhale and exhale, or visualise beautiful white light in and around you.
Once you feel relaxed and ready, conjure up an 3D real life image your ex partner or whoever is causing you the pain and see them sitting right in front of you…face to face, eyeball to eyeball, sitting on your bed with you or in the park – wherever you are in that moment.
You might be able to see them clear as day; every detail of their face, their eyes, their mouth, how they chewed their nails, smell what cologne they used to wear, how they used to dress, the way they styled their hair. Or you might see them blurry or faded and find it hard to remember what they look like – maybe you have blocked it out for so long. Visualise every part of them sitting there in front of you, in arms reach. Feel them!
Once you have established them in front of you, it’s time to say everything (in your mind) you ever felt or currently feel to him or her.
Yell it, scream it, explain it, whisper it in their ear – whatever feels right for you. Just get it all out – tell them exactly how you feel.
Tears might stream down your cheeks, you might feel stabbing pains in your heart, your throat might tighten up, you might feel numb and nothing at all…it doesn’t matter, just get it out of your mind and off your chest because this is the stuff that causes cancer!
Ask them a question, such as “Why did you betray me?” or “What happened?” or “How do I let you go?”
(Tune in to what you really want to know from them.)
Instinctively an answer will arise.
She or he will answer you from their heart (you will know the right answer and how they feel from your intuition – a powerful medium).
Hear them apologise to you.
And maybe you say sorry to them.
When you feel ready to let go and say goodbye to your ex, you give them a hug. You can hold them for as long as you want, you can cry, stoke their hair, hold their hand, you can do your old code handshake you used to do, just do whatever you need to do to let them go.
Allow yourself to cry, sob, wail.
Wish them well on their journey ahead, forgive them, forgive yourself, then say goodbye and actually say in your mind ‘I let you go now’.
Then see them disappear, vanish or walk away until they’re faded into the white light.
You might feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders, you might feel lighter, clearer, happy, ecstatic, numb, shocked, peaceful or less pain in a certain area of your body.
Once you recognise how you feel, then it’s time to meditate on the things you are grateful for in your life.
Concentrate on the gratitude you feel for your mum, dad, siblings, grandparents, cousins, aunties, uncles, best friends, work colleagues, strangers – anyone you feel thankful for having them in your life. Anyone who makes your life that little bit better.
Give thanks for the Universe for what you DO have in your life and stop wallowing in your own pain and get on with your life. Breathe in the good energy from your loved ones and breathe out your good energy to them.
Given you don’t now think I’m that crazy woman in the park with her eyes closed, crying and talking to herself – go home and try it for yourself! If you’re broken hearted, broken someone’s heart and feel awful about it or know of anyone who is or has send this onto them.
There is no point in carrying this pain around with you. Release it!
You don’t have to stay miserable and hurting for months on end.
Grieve (not for too long!) for the end of a relationship, but remember to celebrate the beginning of a new adventure ahead…
[Written in 2012]