Do you feel bad every time you eat a doughnut, bread, or a slice of cake? Do you feel awkward explaining to your lover how to make you orgasm or what you enjoy most sexually? Do you feel guilty when you put yourself first?
In this article you will discover owning and embracing your pleasure and how to take pleasure into your own hands.
If so, you may have accepted society’s false pressures and ideologies about women and pleasure. As women, we have been conditioned to believe that pleasure is wrong, disgraceful, and even dangerous and must be controlled or suppressed. Many women end up believing they are not deserving of pleasure.
This. Must. Stop.
It’s time to crush these false expectations about women and pleasure and start fully embracing the fact that you deserve *all* kinds of pleasure. No more guilt. No more shame. No more giving in to society’s views on women and pleasure.
Here, we’ll look at five tips for embracing pleasure and disregarding what we have been taught about our bodies, our enjoyment, sex, and more.
5 Tips for Embracing Pleasure
1. Pleasure Isn’t Earned
One of the most important things to understand about pleasure is that you do not have to earn it. You deserve it. You are entitled to it. It is yours to take and does not have to be restricted, portioned, controlled, or hidden.
You were born with the capacity to experience physical, mental, and emotional pleasure — all you have to do is take it.
2. Embrace What You Find Pleasurable, Not What Society Deems Pleasurable
In addition to teaching us to deny or tone down our pleasure, society also tries to label *what* counts as pleasurable. Society likes to try to convince us that certain beauty treatments, foods, or clothes are where we will find pleasure.
It is up to you to determine what kind of foods, experiences, sex, masturbation, and hobbies you find pleasurable, not society.
3. Know What True Pleasure Feels Like
Once you realise the false expectations and labels society has placed on how we enjoy pleasure and what counts as pleasure, it is time to distinguish what YOU find truly pleasurable.
To recognise if something is pleasurable to you, think about how you feel before, during, and after it. Are you using it as a reward or an escape? Do you feel drained afterwards rather than replenished?
A true pleasure involves being fully present and immersed in something that makes you feel rejuvenated, alive, and happy.
4. Forget Society’s Limits on Pleasure
Society likes to tell women we can enjoy only the right kind of sex with certain people. Or that we can enjoy a little food, but only certain types in moderation (to make sure our bodies look a certain way, of course).
It’s time to throw away society’s false notions about pleasure and determine for yourself what kind of pleasure you enjoy most and what is healthy for you and your well-being.
5. Take Pleasure Into Your Own Hands – Literally
Have you ever noticed it is often assumed that women need to seek pleasure through a man rather than creating it themselves? It is time to feel empowered to seek pleasure through masturbation. Talk about it with your girlfriends. Talk about it with your partner. Find what works for you.
Whether it is your favourite sex toy, using your fingers to experiment with different motions or rhythms on your clitoris, or enjoying mutual masturbation with a partner, have some fun pleasuring yourself!
Do You Struggle With Embracing Pleasure?
If you have found yourself feeling guilty about an extra piece of cake, touching yourself, missing a workout, or expressing your desires in the bedroom, I invite you to start owning your power as a woman and embracing the pleasure you are entitled to.
Remember, this is a journey and can take time. Treat yourself with grace along the way and keep working at it. It takes time to undo the years and years of pressures and falsehoods society has placed on women.
And if you need help along the way, I am here for you! Helping women understand and embrace their bodies, sexuality, and pleasure is what I love to do. For more support on your journey, check out my blog or join my private Facebook group, a haven for women to discuss anything and everything!
Wishing you self-acceptance and pleasure!