Orgasms are wonderful! There is no doubt about that.
But who can say no to the potential for an even better orgasm? That is what edging, an increasingly popular technique, is bringing to many women.
What Is Edging?
Edging is the technique of bringing yourself to the brink — or the edge — of orgasm, backing off for about 30 seconds, and then resuming stimulation.
Get to the brink of orgasm and back off enough times and you can set yourself up for absolutely explosive, pulsating, powerful orgasm. It may even give you the most intense orgasm of your life!
The Power of Self-Awareness
Along with the potential for mind-blowing orgasms, edging also increases your awareness of your sexual responses, both solo and with a partner. This can help encourage improved mindfulness in the bedroom and a deeper connection with your body.
This can also help you discover the four stages of arousal and give you a clear awareness of when to stop and start stimulation.
- Excitement – This stage brings flushed skin, tense muscles, a faster heartbeat, and blood flow directed to the clitoris and vagina.
- Plateau – The effects of stage one — excitement — get even more intense and you feel yourself approaching orgasm. This is the stage to get ready to hold back a bit or stop stimulation if you are practicing edging.
- Orgasm – This delicious stage involves muscle and nerve responses that bring about increased vaginal lubrication and the feeling of ecstasy.
- Resolution – Upon orgasm, tissues go back to their pre-arousal state and vitals normalise.
While each stage can vary from person to person, the best way to discover what you feel during each stage is through self-exploration, either by yourself or with a partner.
How Do I Try Edging?
If you want to try edging, start by paying attention to what sensations you experience right before orgasm and focus on remaining in that stage between plateau and orgasm. The more you get to know your body, the easier it will be to recognise the perfect moment to back off.
Here are three fun ways to experiment with edging:
For solo edging, start by setting up the ideal pleasure environment:
- Lock the doors
- Turn down the lights (or keep them on… whatever feels best to you)
- Put on your favourite music, white noise, a fan (or enjoy the silence and the sound of your breath)
- Use a diffuser to scent the room with your favourite essential oils
Once you set up your perfect space, it is time to start masturbating until you bring yourself to the point of orgasm. Once you feel yourself approaching the peak, slow down your movements or stop completely for about 30 seconds.
Take deep breaths and focus on how your body is feeling. Do you feel more excited? Are you shaking or sweating? Do you feel tensed or relaxed?
Begin touching yourself again or speeding up your pace and repeat the process again for another one to three times (or however many you want!). Do this until you are ready to completely surrender and let go. Pay attention to the intensity of your orgasm or any new sensations to see if edging is something you want to continue experimenting with.
2. With a Partner
To practice edging with your partner, get aroused with your favourite foreplay activities. Make sure to be vocal and give clear clues about when you are approaching your peak and have your partner slow down or take a brief break from stimulation. Repeat as many times as you want until you are ready.
3. With a Toy
You can also incorporate toys into your edging practice. Use your favourite toy to explore different angles, rhythms, speeds, and more.
How Long Should You Edge Before You Orgasm?
How long should you edge? That is totally up to you! It’s all about what you find the most enjoyable. Play around with it and have fun.
The main thing you want to be careful of is delaying your orgasm so long that you experience a disappearing or half orgasm. Essentially, this is when you do not feel the full-body effects of orgasm. It’s okay if this happens, just adjust your technique for next time and try reaching your peak and stopping just once or twice.
Timing your stimulation perfectly can be difficult at first, but that is part of the fun and challenge of edging. Just as with orgasms, it is important to avoid placing all the focus on the ending. Rather, view each experience as a beautiful chance to explore your body and learn about yourself.
Are There Any Benefits To Edging?
Along with increasing your sexual self-awareness, edging may offer other benefits when it comes to improving sex and masturbation:
1. Easier Orgasms
A 2014 study of 96 women found that the women who masturbated were more likely to reach orgasm. The more time you spend getting comfortable with and getting to know your body, the easier it is to get aroused, have fun, and have an orgasm.
2. Increased Body Confidence
A 2006 study of almost 2,000 women discovered that almost three-quarters of them reported sexual dysfunctions but were too embarrassed to discuss these issues with their doctor.
By learning more about your body through edging, it can translate into an increased level of comfort with your body and awareness of it. This may give you more confidence to approach your doctor with any sex-related questions or concerns.
3. Put the Focus in the Right Place
Much of the focus during sex is often placed on the act of penetration. Edging helps place the emphasis on a more holistic, partner-focused experience. You can even invite your partner to try edging with you.
Are You Ready to Try Edging?
I am a huge advocate of sexual experimentation, discovering what works for your body, and having fun! I’m also an advocate of listening to your body and steering clear of any pressure or expectations.
So please remember that it is 100% okay if edging doesn’t work for you or if you have zero interest in trying it. Ultimately, the goal is to accept your body and learn what works for you.
If you want to discover masturbation techniques, how to truly embrace and accept yourself, and learn more about all-things-sex, please feel free to check out my blog. You can also join my private Facebook group, a safe place to ask any and all questions about sex!
Wishing you self-acceptance and pleasure!